at the same time, as humans, we are also hardwired to have feelings and emotions and shit like that. so the two either must be in balance or at least be properly channeled with an open line of communication between parties.
in other words, don't mix feelings and emotions with the pure, physical act of fucking unless there are feelings and emotions. it is my belief that usage of the verb "to fuck" inherently indicates the lack of feeling/emotion involved, as opposed to "make love" or "have sex" even, both of which indicate some sort of mind connection.
with fuck buddies, everyone involved has gotta be on the same page. they gotta be adult about the situation, embrace the situation, avoid reading any meaning into the situation.
i don't want to know what you did today, i don't want to know what your hopes and dreams are, i don't want to know what makes you laugh, cry, none of that shit. that's the sorta thing you reserve for... a lover.
fucking's different.
on a personal note, i have reached the point in my life where i'd rather have that mind connection during sex. for me, looking in a woman's eyes and feeling something while, literally, feeling something is much more satisfying than simply fucking like an animal then going to bed.
unfortunately, it's a desolate world sometimes, and ya gotta do whatcha gotta do.
Which probably explains why the best "FBs" are married or "in a relationship"- they already have that emotional connection with someone else (even if it's not that satisfying). Although, sometimes that can also go awry and they can shift their emotional connection to the wrong person.
ReplyDeleteyah. no matter what the sitch, i think both parties have gotta be on the same page and talk the shit out. even that is rare. and that's usually how people get hurt. 'fraid there is no easy solution.
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