Killing each other over imaginary friends

israel is now warning jews in the united states that iran is targeting them in a series of possible attacks.

same fucking ignorant story.

my imaginary friend is bigger and better than your imaginary friend.

for those religious moderates who still say we should just allow everyone to believe whatever it is they want, and let them do whatever it is they want to do when it comes to praising invisible sky daddies because it's IMPOLITE to pass judgement on such delusional idiocy, i ask you, AGAIN, are you ready to die because of these rampant running looney tunes!?!?!?

instead of allowing this sort of bloodshed to flourish, we should be focusing on educating the masses and informing them exactly why their delusions are not only asinine, but more important: DEADLY.

we wouldn't let some crazy math teacher run around telling our kids that 2+2=5 just because some nonsensical old book his daddy's daddy's daddy wrote during the bronze age said so.

WAKE.

UP.

DON'T BE FOOLED: islam (and all the other delusional religious practices out there) are not about peace

if religious folks WERE all about peace, then they would stop the centuries and centuries of hate, of discrimination, of slander, of WAR, of claiming they're right and you're wrong.

the bible is full of hate. sure there's some feel-good shit in there too, but much of it is hate. hate against women, hate against non-jews, hate against gay folks, brown folks, etc. the koran is also full of hate. THE PENALTY FOR APOSTASY IS DEATH.

and now, this. someone pokes fun at islamic delusions and the muslims respond by blowing some shit up. again.

practitioners of peace my ass.

some sorta of twistedly sick fucking joke, that's what this is.

What would jeebus do -- twin towers edition

(via b3ta)

Remembering

i'm in new york city today. all weekend. i'm taking in this 10 year stuff. going to the mets game tonight and i look forward to being involved with the ceremonies and speeches.

say what you want about politics (certainly they were involved), but this shit happened because of religion and i'll never forget that day and how it changed my life.

people have been murdering people over their imaginary friends for a long fucking time. isn't it about time we catch up to reason and stop this shit?

Toe-MAY-toe, to-MAH-toe, you're all fucking crazy

this man (and his delusional followers) are just as much to blame for islamic terrorism as anyone else. in fact, i would go as far as to say that what his evangelical movement has done to the united states is equally damaging as those acts of terrorism.

they have taken REASON hostage and duped a throng of idiots into following a path of racist, sexist, homophobic lunacy DISGUISED as altruism.

sorry, but the very nature of religion -- a means to control a society with delusional promises it can't possibly back up -- cancels out any true altruist yearnings. 

how can you be altruistic while spreading a fucking cancerous lie?

"Dear religion" by 9GAG

(via 9GAG)

Another 2 minutes and 35 seconds of pure terror

having been a victim of christian delusionoidism myself, it's no secret that the fastest way to piss me off is by force feeding bullshit to kids who really don't know any better. i can only hope that the kid featured here, like me, grew up and learned how to think for himself.

i so fucking hope.

(thanks to A for the vid link)

Can't teach an old dog new weltanschauungs

i spent a weekend with my elderly grandmother recently. she may be set in her ways and cranky but she always means well and she is a really kind person. that being said, it can't be ignored that she's racist and has no tolerance for anything "new". her circle of friends is similar. small town country folk for life, their worldviews are just a bit skewed against what is typically considered normal (or at least politically correct) these days.

she and i joined four other old ladies for an afternoon of coffee and puzzling (those fucking things are hard to put together by the way) and one of her friends started yapping about that little girl who was molested by a TSA screener. instead of talking about the issue, this old lady said: "i can't believe a good american would do something like that. i could believe it if a muslim arab did that, but not an american."

um... lady, what the fuck?!?!? americans do awful shit every day. rape, murder, molest. what the fuck? since when does nationality make any difference in a person's propensity to do bad shit?

the really scary thing is that everyone else at the table agreed with her and then they talked shit about brown people for a good hour.

THAT, my friends, is pretty much the intelligence level we're working with here in this country. scary shit.

PS, the lady also mentioned that i should look up a christian author she likes who writes christian romance novels. yeah, thanks. i'll make sure i do that after i pull my testicles up and out through my shaft.

I totally know how ya feel, batman

i mean, i won't go as far as to say i 'hate' someone, especially someone i was once intimate with, because i don't. i don't hate people (maybe islamic terrorists, but that's about it). still, some breakups hurt more than others and the only thing one can do to shield himself from the pain is to say fuck it and totally disassociate with her all together. it's the only way.

(image via skull swap)

Dear god

also, dear god let the infidels suffer a long, agonizing death. and kill the gays.

i think the "god" these people reference would be okay with that. after all, he is an asshole. (he let jayson werth make $23 million a fucking year!)

(image via smbc)

Happy fourth!

hope it's a bang of a time, no matter what you're doin'! me? i'm eating a lot, drinking a lot and trying to find a cure for stupid people.

(ps, i have a feeling that a terrorist's favorite holiday is anything with a lot of explosions, so watch out, y'all!)

Do i really wish there were 72 virigins?

i had a dream about these two the other night.

then, somehow i started thinking about what it'd be like with 3... then with 4... then... nah, couldn't go past that. it was too much work.

so i can only imagine 72 would be some real fucking work.

of course, it'd be work that people who are willing to blow up themselves, and buildings, and children, and anything that gets in their fucking way of infinite regression and everlasting make-believe would fucking do.

my mom says i say "fuck" too much.

fuck that.

so yeah, i wonder if those guys ever stop and think about the fact that after he fucks them they won't be virgins anymore... or that they won't even be young forever... that eventually those 72 virgins will turn into 72 incontinent nagging bitches.

fuck that.

seriously.

fuck that.

Perception is a bitch

to-MAY-to, to-MAH-to, bla bla bla...

most people find cats adorable. i find them despicable: cute little agents of chaos who will burn you when ya ain't lookin' (or in my case, while you're lookin' right at 'em). just look at this cat. it most definitely harbors some hidden agenda. being this close to the remote control is not natural.

of course, i realize i am in the minority here -- that i'll never break the 'cats are cute' status quo. but that doesn't mean i have to join the masses. in fact, it means i have to work harder to shift the balance.

did i mention i am highly allergic to them?

look, it's hard for me to argue against the fact that cats are cute. they are. some hookers are cute too; but i know if i sleep with one i might come out burned.

with cats, i KNOW i'll come out burned... suffering along with great big welts, hives... watery, itchy eyes... and the intolerable feeling that an army of fire ants are digging through every single pore of my skin.

damn you kitties!!!

(this feline comes via greta)

Just the thought of this being a reality makes me want to gut-fist myself while wearing a needle-studded glove made out of burning toxic brine

Faith is not a virtue, it's a fucking cancer

if you think for one second that those jihadists who blew up the towers did so because they were evil incarnate, fraught with sinister blood, thoughts, intentions, then let me be the lucky one to tell ya that you are so full of shit. wake up! those crazy fucks didn't do that shit because they were evil, they did it because they believed their beliefs were/are true. they did then and their contemporaries do now. they understand their 'holy book' literally and therefore all non-muslims -- especially those who get in their way -- must die... for the glory of allah or whatevs...

they are just being good muslims.

and they only feel that way because they were brought up that way, from an early age, to believe in the plethora of bullshit and never question it.

now if i came up to you and said, "hey there, mister/ma'am, i got some inside information on the creator of this universe and he's a part dragon part clown thingy who can see and hear and touch and feel everything you do and all ya gotta do to be in his favor is give me a donation or, gee, if you're not doin' anything why don't you strap this dynamite on your back and walk into a courthouse"... don't you think you'd question this crazy ass motherfucker?

but people don't question religion, no matter how fucking nutso crazy it is (and i assure you, it is). we aren't allowed to question religion and that is a fucking tragedy.

"faith is a virtue" is the phrase kids are taught so they don't try to, y'know, think for themselves... ever. no other thing, place, idea has people so ready to support unquestioningly than religion... and it's the one thing that oughtta be questioned more than anything else. because even though it starts out as just a kid believing in some far-fetched fairytales... before long that kid is blowin' up buildings and murdering babies for the glory of god.

question... EVERYTHING