Ah... yes! now it all makes sense!

Why does sexy time have such a bad rep?

i like sex.

you (i'm assuming) like sex.

errybody likes sex!

so why the fuck is it such a taboo topic... STILL... after all these millennium?

the fucking church. that's why.

religions cast a bad shadow over sex so they can guilt/control people. shame and hate and shunning... these are age old tricks used by "authority".

well authority can fucking blow me. i like sex and i have no problem talking about it, or pursuing it, or FUCKING HAVING IT.

how ya like that popey pope?

that's right. i love me some vagina. and i really get off on being inside someone and sharing that bond. i totally dig lookin' in a woman's eyes and feeling something stronger than anything i could ever attempt to put into words.

and

sometimes

i

just

like

fuckin'.

and ya know what? as long as it's done between consenting adults, it's all totally natural. totally cool. totally reasonable.

i swear, if every man shot his wad and every woman climbed mount orgasm once a day, this world would be a much better place to live. and i could concentrate on posting more about sexy time treats than calling out religious train wrecks.

Beatifying schmeatifying

not only are catholics delusional, but they are also extremely efficient at pomp and bullshit circumstance.

pope john paul II got beatified... whatever the fuck that means.

i do know that it's another step towards sainthood... which is just another act of delusionoidism. they believe that their popey pope can do magic just like their jeebus.

i know one thing: sitting back and letting sexual deviancy infiltrate the ranks ain't no thang when it comes to lobbying for sainthood, beatifying or whatevs.

but what can one really expect from an institution that has reeked of corruption and evil for centuries and centuries and centuries...???

Gimme a fucking break, popey pope

in the pope's latest (and i'll admit lamest) attempt to appear worthy of the secular (read: anti-delusional) world's attention, he "lifts blame from jews for christ's death".

well, well, well, mr. funny hat. congratufuckinglations. i'm so glad you found time to lift that blame from the jews. that was really kind of you. i'm sure the jews are really, really relieved that you found it in your heart to do that.

maybe as an encore you can lift the hate and intolerance that STILL permeates your fabricated institution that teaches practical dissonace over open-mindedness and logic-based rationality.

maybe it's all the ghosts and spirits and make-believe shit clouding your mind.

i dunno.

but, please. think about it.

think about it deeply.

Um... it's not the fucking blood of jesus, okay?

i don't care what your man in the pointy hat says... or what father so-and-so does to it... that's wine or grape juice or whatever it is your church wastes time and money on.

it is NOT the blood of jesus, metaphorically or otherwise. 

it is no more the blood of jesus than a can of pop is booty-shakin' juice, or a stein of beer is make-your-sister-look-decent drink, or a shot of tequila is license for me to kick some ass.

it's all smoke, mirrors and make-believe. to think it's anything other than that is a sad, disrespectful slap in the face of reality.

(image via smbc)

Lahdy fucking dah

have ya heard the news, people? the pope -- yeah, the funny old ex-nazi with a penchant for protecting baby-rapers -- has given his blessing on social networking, saying it's okay for us to indulge in cyberspace as long as we maintain genuine, solid, relationships in the real world.

of course, you are not included in this blessing if you are any of the following:

 -- smart
 -- gay
 -- non-catholic (so all you jews and muslims and buddha lovers can get lost too)
 -- vigilant against catholic sanctioned crimes against our youth

i'm sure there are other categories of people who can piss off, according to the popey pope, but i'm not gonna waste any more time getting into it.  the double standards are still there.  the church is still intent on controlling the masses (read: the stupid).  and shit ain't gonna change unless we start calling them out on their delusionoid idiocy.

The thing about the pope is...

... he doesn't have anything (nothing -- not ONE, FUCKING, THING) to back up his claim that "The universe is not the result of chance, as some would want to make us believe. Contemplating it (the universe) we are invited to read something profound into it: the wisdom of the creator, the inexhaustible creativity of God."

except... um... well...

you're talkin crazy outchya ASS.

and you have no evidence to back your insane claim.

because that's what it is -- your religion and pomp and circumstance built to deceive, take and silence -- it's fucking insane.

These crazy delusionoids run powerful countries!!!

tony blair.

george dubya.

the pope.

i don't care what position they have/had. they're all fucking crazy to any sensible, rational person. and we allow them and people like them to have the power to fight wars on our behalf. we do that.

we allow it.

and we ought to be ashamed.

Seriously? his own car too?

still? we're still allowing apparently logical, grounded people to believe this guy has some magic power, some enchanted spirit that somehow transcends into the sky to mesh with an invisible man?

it's fucking ludicrous.

the time, the money, the grandeur wasted on such a joke is as sad as it is disappointing.

More bullshit dogma that backs up the pope

i'm sure he's probably using this somehow

i mean, he would.

bleh.

p.s. happy tax day! wanna pay my taxes?
:-)

Please, hurry up and arrest his ass!

my favorite dick (richard dawkins) is teamin' up with christopher hitchens to get the pope arrested or crimes against humanity during his upcoming trip to the united kingdom.

that sounds awesome.

except for the fact that it is a pipe dream.

oh, believe me, if we could get this baby-rapin'-allowin' creep-ball outta of the limelight and convince people that he's not supernatural, that he's not the voice/hand of god, that he's no different than you and i in that he shouldn't be dictating the lives of the masses... i would be all for it.

but we live in a fucked up world:

and as the above chart clearly shows...we're all fucked.

More infuriation (or, Petty criticism my ass)

apparently the pope's critics -- those (like myself) who are angered by his passive stance against and tolerance for known pedophiles in the priesthood -- are simply engaging in the "petty gossip of dominant opinion".

okay, popey pope. yeah. whatevs.

'cuz raping children under the guise of christianity sure is petty. what a fucking joke.

everything about the vatican makes me sick right now.

i'm apalled.

seriously.

and i'm not an idiot. i realize that the majority of catholics (while deluded and close-minded) are probably nice, kind people.

but isn't it a bit ironic that the same people who tout religion as being necessary to ensure moral standards somehow find baby-raping to be exempt from this necessary code?

the hypocrisy is as astounding as it is infuriating.

You have GOT to be FUCKING kidding me

so now, not only are we educated folk subjected to the heinous idiocy of the sky god realm by having to recognize an old guy in a silly white hat as having some sort of revered opinion on world issues, but now we also have to be okay with the fact that under his not-so-watchful eye a whole shitload of pedophilia was "allowed" (at least, certainly not punished in a just manner) to permeate the church...

of course, this isn't really news to most of us... the molestation problems within catholosicm have been widely publicized for some time now. the real fucking joke is that since the pope is being exposed as an abettor in this mess, people (like myself) want him gone, and our loud cries for justice are quickly met with (yep, you guessed it) more fantasyland sky god bullshit:

says some "reverend" thomas doyle (a whistle blower in this case):

"the only person who can fire him [the pope] is god"

well, ain't that fucking convenient?

sorry, you're honor... i may have looked the other way while all these children's lives were being destroyed in order to keep the image of the church in tact, and you might think that a criminal act, but guess what, only god can punish me. haha! fucker!

except there's one little problem, popey pope, god is as real as my three way doublemint twins fantasy.

and let me tell ya, if that were real, i wouldn't be wasting my time writing about your sorry ass.

The king of the delusionals

so yeah... the pope is all up in the headlines today for bein' soft on irish and german and whatever other nationality's priests who be rapin' altar boys these days.

okay. he's under scrutiny for some nasty sex scandals. i get that.

but why isn't he under scrutiny for parading around a ridiculously archaic worldview like it matters in the 21st century?

surely there is just punishment for such manipulative mind bending.

and that's all i have to say about that.

for now.